Mother's Day & Thoughts on Motherhood

Sunday was my first mother's day as a mother, and it was a fabulous day.  I was spoiled with a delicious brunch made by my husband from scratch while I got to hang out in bed (with Lincoln) while Benjamin napped in his room.  It was a sweet day getting love from my wonderful husband and my fabulous son.

And in light of the day celebrating motherhood, as well as the controversial Time Magazine cover photo that stirred so much debate this week, I wanted to share a few of my thoughts on this new job of mine (shocking!).

I love being a mom.  And it is no lie when mother's say that it is the hardest job one could ever have.  To try and care for, love, and meet the needs of another human being at all times requires a lot of hard work, sacrifice, patience, forgiveness, love, and grace (for all parties). Oh, and sometimes tears. As much grief as I've given my own mother over the years, taking care of my own baby has made me so appreciative of how much she did to love and care for me when I was so tiny and helpless myself.  (I mean, I happen to think I turned out pretty darn well.)  And we moms just try to do the best with what we have.  In the end, I have come to believe that this is all that really matters - did my son know how loved he was and that I was willing to do anything for him?  I sure hope he'll always know that!  And during times like we've had the past week at the Larson home when Benjamin has had some more tummy problems which have resulted in lots of tears and sleepless nights (again, for all parties), I hope he knows somewhere in that little heart of his that I stayed up every night with him trying to help him feel better, rocking him to sleep, shushing his cries, loving him as best I could in a sleep-deprived and frustrated state, and praying for his health and happiness all the while.  I don't think he'll remember much about what toys he played with or what clothes he was wearing, but I do think he'll remember and learn from how much love we surrounded him with.  Like I said in a previous post, this is something I need to regularly remind myself.

With regards to the Time Magazine article that brought to light some of the attachment parenting theory topics often discussed in mom circles and blogs, I can't help but put in my own two cents.  Do we carry our baby around in a sling everywhere?  Nope.  Frankly, Benjamin never really loved the popular Moby wrap, and he's just as content hanging out with his toys as he is cruising around in the Baby Bjorn with us.  Do we co-sleep with our baby? Well, our pediatrician recommends against it due to safety concerns, so only when my boy is feeling rough and needing lots of extra attention will I take snoozes with him on the couch.  Will we breastfeed till our baby is four?  Well, of course this part is obvious.  Since I wasn't able to breastfeed (something that still haunts me to this day), of course we won't.  (Nevermind that we are now on our fourth "special" formula to try and control the milk allergy that has been giving Benjamin so much trouble.)  And do I think my ways are best for all babies?  Of course not.  But do I think they are best for Benjamin?  You bet.  I don't think someone else could ever tell me that the love and care we give (or how we give it) to Benjamin won't help him grow into a standup young man who is kind, thoughtful, smart, and loving.  I am pretty confident it will.  And I know that he is already becoming that young man in small ways every day.  The joy that emanates from his face and the love he has for being around others are just two tiny pieces of evidence that whatever we're doing is working so far for us and for Benjamin. So fellow mothers out there, I hope we can all appreciate and love one another for the ways - as different as they may be - that we raise our children.  There is no one right way.  Sure, there are lots of wrong ways, but sometimes I suppose we need to learn those things too.  And in the meantime, as long as we are loving our children as we help them grow and develop into amazing young men and women who are in turn generous, loving, and gracious towards their fellow humankind, then we're doing a great job.  

This, of course, is no small task.

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Some photos from my Mother's Day:

 

some couch time with my boys

And some sweet words and laughs with my boy: